Sunday, September 17, 2006

finale :(

i'm not a college going 21yr old anymore ,
i threw out my dirty sneakers ,
i'm anything but jobless !
yes i still love beer and aniston , and if crichton wrote another book i would read it ....

but i guess its time for this blog to shut down .

i've moved out of the nest - entered into the corporate world - started to live alone - surviving on self made experimental food - wash my undies - calculate taxes - and say things like, "later , i'm in a meeting right now ! " or "i'm creating a paradigm for my client to increase his productivity without compromising on his loss rate " !!

yes i definitely can't be the author of " dirtysneaker diaries "

perhaps a new blog !

sandy ban gaya consultant

I'm now a Business Intelligence Consultant with an year old , growing ANALYTICS startup !

Thursday, August 10, 2006

finally a break !

Its half way into the year I graduated.
after four years of torture , I made it through alive , with fairly decent grades ( that only I know do not in anyway reflect my potential ) and a creativity deprived IT job that will earn me a few quid .

Now, I'm not saying that I'm not grateful for what I have, but life is just too normal and ordinary for it to be good!

In the past 6 years I've have had more dreams & twice as many schemes, than the number of scud missiles exchanged between Lebanon and Israel; but in a world that works on nepotism, money and mostly on no particular logic... my goals keep loosing their exclusivity, and make me question if they are worth pursuing, and I end up looking at others living my "once" dream!

I know that the chances of me becoming some kick-ass Technical Consultant, right out of a Michael Crichton book , who is called in the middle of the night and flown on chopper , to some covert commercial facility in the middle of a desert , or an island inhabited by artificially designed creatures , or a military base in the middle of the sea .... are pretty bleak .

But the least I deserve, is to work on something I'm good at ; pursue something that I like and specialize in it ; and not be yet another clone working in an IT company with half the population of the country, most of whom don't know the A and B, leave alone the C of programming . A very unfortunate fact about the way this industry works!

============================

Finally a break!
after applying for a million unconventional jobs ,for which I was either under qualified , overqualified or ignored ; I finally got a call from a totally rad, young startup , who happen to do exactly what I'm looking for !

For the first time, the interview made SENSE!
The interviewer, (also the guy who founded the company), respected one attribute that many tend to ignore: Common Sense!
I was thrilled to discuss about my childhood dreams; about a small school project that nobody had ever taken much interest in, until now; about how intelligence rocks and education does not; about my final year project that took me a month to construct and just ten minutes for him to understand (over the phone!!); about my philosophies of treating the A-star search algorithm as a way of life....

If only our country worked this way!

I've not been recruited by him yet. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. But if I do join, then I'm sure my life will be < in a phrase that I've been liberal with after the interview > ..... KICK ASS!!

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

why ? why god why ?

oh crap !
this sucks .

i think today's events will change the theme of this blog .

no , not cuz ...

> Bohemia was granted freedom of religion today
> Louis Pasteur successfully tested his vaccine against rabies
> Malawi became a republic
> The dollar was unanimously chosen as the money unit for the United States
> Or cuz, Bush, SlyStallone, 50Cent, and Dalai Lama were born this day

but cuz, I'm not 21 anymore !
with the cruel movement of the second hand (and i dono how we still believe that, us inventing time was a good thing), i've been transformed from an absolutely jobless 21 yr old boy to an absolutely jobless 22 yr old man-BOY !

I'll be expected to .... shave everyday, NOT run around in my nickers, NOT make faces in the mirror, NOT punch the walls practicing homemade kung-fu, NOT laugh out loud watching Mr.Bean, and maybe NOT even play hide and seek (except when i'm running from the govt).

besides 22 jus aint as cool sounding as 21 !

why ? why god why ? why do u do this to us ?

Monday, June 12, 2006

the world is NOT flat !


so turns out the world is a sphere after all .
i know so .
and not cuz of galileo or kepler .
i saw it .
i saw it standing on a 50 feet tall cliff of one of the small isles of the andaman and nicobar archipelago , and findin water everywhere, as long as my sight took me. the horizon forming a perfect circle .

oh btw , i went to a & n (ok, i wasnt allowed to enter nicobar and only 10 percent of andy was accessible to tourists ). but i still got to experience wat life is like on island(s) ... tat are actually caps of mountains within the sea , more than a 1000 kms frm d mainland ; tat create a 3d image of all tat u read in jp and lost world (sans the dinos) ; tat can teach u the basics of anthropology in 3 days ; tat is inhabited by essentially immigrants from all over india and is the home to around five indegenous tribes, few of which ve never contacted the world outside their isles ; tat has been meddled around wit, by the british, the japs ,indians and very recently by tsunami !

i ve experiences to tell . the adventure ride on an overloaded dongi(small wooden boats), moving slowly on the backwaters, possibly ( most definitely) infested wit crocs and snakes, wit not a single soul to be seen in either direction, and surrounded by jungles inhabited by the (possibly) hostile tribes; the trek thru the real jungles; the exploration of the ruins of an abondoned british island township; walk thru the corridors of one of the most torturous prisons of all times; the ride on the ferry; meetin the semi clad jarawans wit bows and spears and the eye contatct wit the patriach of the group; eating in a village inhabited by the descendants of slaves brought by the british , who still almost live the way their forefathers did in their homeland before bein brt here 300 yrs back; fingering the ejections of a mud volcano; floatinn in sea water staring at an uninabitted island , with the blunt afternoon sun glistenin on the water ; discovery of a dog on an isolated island ( ?!? how ?! ); the corals; the jellyfish; the clear water; the realisation tat earth indeed is sphere !!

but i guess tat will take too much time. so i'll focus on one experience. the high point of the trip. it happened wen i was standing on a cliff overlooking the placid inner-sea seperating my island from the one on the horizon, wit a single hauntin & almost naked tree growing frm the sea ,and the sound of the soft passive waves splashing on the colourful rocks below and the chirpin of an unknown avian species filling the silence . silence like i had never heard or not heard !
i realised for a moment tat i was detached . detached from the world . i experienced wat alcoholics call, a moment of clarity!
i was away .
away from the crowd, meaningless education, comic politicians, mindless traffic, pollution, schrodingers wave equation , signal processors, sharma aunty and her ques abt MS-MBA ,creativeless IT companies, TV wit a zillion channels , bullshit consumerism wit huge billboards & celebs & witless ads , carin to ve some guy's name on ur underwear !
away frm all the crap .
i wonder why i live in the world i live in .
i wish of, the life of a simple sraight man, on this island. part fisherman, part farmer, part hunter, part architect and interior desiner, part engineer, part doc.
jus me and my woman .
and wen i say me, i mean a me wit six pack abs , ralf nadal like arms , wit awesome swimmin and huntin skills .
and wen i say my woman , i expect no-one less than brooke shields.
so ya , me and my woman . we wake up to te risin sun. we eat figs n fruits for breakfast in our organic hut made of bark,wood n leaves; overlookin the green island a lil away and the calm sea seperatin us. then do everyday chores, tat are simple and easy to picturize and ve notin to do wit electrons and deutrons and their freakin frequencies. den i go fishin wit my harpoon and come bak wit a huge game . i make fire while she dresses the hunt. we ve smoked fish together on earthern plates , under the bright moon and stars , wit its brightness not attenuated by polluton . and den we ...u know ... dot dot dot , all nite ( and i din mention earlier but also, sometimes in the afternoon after lunch ) .

simple everday goals. simple life. happiness all around.

wish , we humans werent so smart . or wish we had taken a diff path durin evolution and stayed happy like the jarawan tribals i met in the tribal reserves of middle andaman !

comin back , andamans is the perfect "get away" . it's not rockin like goa. def not a party place. but the site of the green mountainous islands , the color of different layers of the sea , the miniature white beaches , the forests , the breeze .
they beat the massage by d best masseuse in d best spa on d planet !

wish i could explore more . go to havelock and nearby islands, the nicobars, and the sentilese islands. try not gettin killed and see how ppl there live. see wat they eat (provided tey are not cannibals). find out their take on economics , technology, religion and see all tat nature has to offer .

andy , i m comin back !

Sunday, June 04, 2006

wats up ?

i think i found it.
3.8 billion years after THE creation , it took jus 4 years for a bored undergrad to find out ... the purpose of life !
it surprises me , tat i'm the first one to figure it out .
cuz every place i go , everywhere , everyday , everytime , everyone seems to be askin the question . THE question .
I've no doubt , tat we were created to find THE answer to THE question .
the most fundamental question .
the final question .
the ONLY question ....

WAT IS UP ?

infact rite from single celled organisms , to duck billed platypus , to apatosauruses and velociraptors , to cows and cats and dogs and mice ... and homo and hetero sapiens ... everyone has been tryin really hard to find the answer to the ULTIMATE QUESTION of LIFE . ( im sorry mr doug adams , i think u got the wrong ques )

the bad news is that, so far no one seems to ve found the answer .

which is why for the past 700 million years .... in the oceans, in the seas, in the skies, in the woods, in prisons, in country pubs, in urban workplaces, in college campuses, on messengers , on orkut .... every time two livin beings meet , they ask one another, in the despearte hope tat the other person mite kno THE answer ... answer to WAT IS UP ?

ever seen a street dog, runnin behind a speeding car, chasin it and barking for no apparent reason ?
wat do u think is it sayin ?
i thik its tired of its meaningless existence and checkin if the driver mite know the answer . THE answer .
"hey! bow wow wow wat , wat , wat is up ? wat is up ? wat ? wat ? wow wow bow wow "

or cows looking at the skies and mooing ?
they are sick of their bovine life , tats why they are lookin up and askin , "wat is up ? wat is up goddamnit !! "

or the silhoutted wolf, wit the huge moon in the background , goin ... whoooooo !
" wats is up u big fat round wite thing ? u must know? wat is UUUUP ? wat ? wat , whaaao, whaaaoooo ..... "

or crows flyin about aimlessly crowin in unison ?
" we are already up ? wat the hell's up ? i cant go any higher ? hey jake do u see anytin here ? do u know wat is up ? "

or snakes hissing ... " hhhhzzsup? hhhhsup? sup? sup? hhhzzzup? hzzz..... "


and i'm guessin once we find THE answer to THE question , we can do away with the other activities we invented to kill time during our search for the truth ; activities more meaningless than life itself , like education-matrimony-religion-wave convolutions etc etc etc .

untill then . keep diggin ...

and oh , now tat we are on the topic ....
note to denizens of the universe : " guys , i do not know THE answer . tell u wat , if i ever find out , i'll call u meself and tell ya . so untill then pls don ask me , everyday of me meaninless life .... wat is up ?"

***

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

the end . the begining

917 booze parties ;
1467 novels ;
9986 movies ;
$5 million fine ;
9358 attemplts of bunking ;
7935 culturals and symposiums ;
98567 miles of travellin ;
and 60 exams later ....

I'm done wit enineering !!

and i survived , i'm a SURVIVOR !

***

I'm happy , i'm elated , i'm relieved .
... after four long years of fun filled torture , torture neverteless . i'm thru . i'm on the other side of the tunnel .

i'm sad , sentimental and absolutely clueless !
... no more canteen , no more bunkin , no more 11th hr - 59th second studyin , no more fake cultural meetings , no more "industrial visits" to beach resorts, no more aimless-meaninless-useless fun talk sessions wit friends ....

this is it . this is the end of me coll life !




turn the page .

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

i've got the power !

Agamemnon , Edward Longshanks , British Raj , Stalin , Hitler , Tutsi Rebels , MA Jinnah , Pres Bush , my Project Guide , Snap (the band ) and Bruce ( in Bruce Almighty ) .... from adam to current day , man has involved himself in acquiring two things :
a. females
b. power

Though my quest for the former continues , in the recent present , i've had the opportunity to get a taste of the latter .

It all started when my folks decided to meet their ancestors , and leave behind their 21 yr old "hopefully - responsible" son : the Sand-Meister , incharge of the house !

So here i am , proudly sitting on the throne , defining POWER !

You know u got the power when you ...

> merge the bike keys with the house keys !
> can pee with the door open
> can watch TV as u do ur morning bizness and take the remote to the loo
> can walk around naked
> can mess with the cushions on the deewaan and get away with it
> take a bath whenever u want to
> can throw ur underwear where-ever u want to
> get to say things like : " Take the day off tomo " , " Keep the change " , " Ok now since i'm the boss , this is how things will be frm now on ... "
> when the maid starts calling you : Saar !
> ask the paperboy to stop dropping the newspaper !
> have pam on ur desktop
> redefine the breakfast-lunch-dinner system

and I my friends ," have got the POWER ! " .